A Writer's Journey

One Reader at a Time

My first royalty check for Costly Grace will arrive soon. Whoopie! Someone in the universe beyond my circle of family, friends, and acquaintances is buying my book, and that’s gratifying. The check will be in the low three-digits, a galaxy away from Dan Brown’s orbit.

Earlier this week I had a book chat over sandwiches and sodas at a local senior center, the first of half-a-dozen author events on my Fall calendar. I signed books and enjoyed their plaudits about my descriptive language, interesting characters, and plot twists. I answered the expected questions: How long did it take you? How do you write? Where do you get your ideas? Are you writing another book?

A woman who knew me in a professional role before my retirement as a psychologist said she couldn’t stop wondering as she read, “Is this the Jim Allaire I know? Where does all this stuff come from?” She singled out my descriptions of women characters and my sleuth’s eye for feminine allures. Everyone laughed and I said it wasn’t me; it was my character Brian Kane’s trait. This led to a discussion of imagination and the role of the unconscious in creative writing.

Someone asked if I expected to “turn a profit” from book sales. My abrupt answer to her blunt question was, “No.” We then talked of motivation and the purpose of writing beyond fame and fortune. We segued to the sex abuse scandal in the Church that figures so prominently in the plot of Costly Grace. We agreed that fiction could sometimes portray truth better than non-fiction.

Royalties aside, payback for the writing effort is coming one reader at a time, mostly in ways unknown to me. I hope Costly Grace provides a good read of a good story, and for some readers, reflective moments about their own existence.

Book Marketing For Fun and . . .

“How many books have you sold?” Several friends have asked me that question. My usual response is “I haven’t ordered a Mercedes yet” or “I’m not on the New York Times best seller list, yet.”

Meanwhile, until yet arrives, I’m learning that book marketing can be fun. Fame and fortune may never come, but I’m surprised how enjoyable my marketing efforts have so far been.

I imagine marketing as a series of concentric circles, each larger one encompassing a wider geographic area. The first circle is family and friends. I’m in the second ring now, the Winona, Minnesota, local area.

Sales numbers won’t come until the end of the quarter, but I’m collecting anecdotal evidence. Folks tell me that they are enjoying Costly Grace—the story, characters, setting, surprise ending. Some have ordered extra copies to give as gifts. Any harsh critics have yet to surface; Minnesota nice dictates they zip their lips. But I really am open to constructive feedback.

The most fun has been meeting new people who are interested in my book and my life as a writer. A half-dozen author events are in the works and I relish the prospect. I like to talk.

What’s next? Who knows, someday soon a reader may whisper in a friend’s ear and he or she will pass it on and by and by it reaches Oprah’s ear. Imagination is a wonderful gift.

Moral Ambiguity

“Is there a moral to the story?” a friend recently asked.

My first response was, “Of course. Costly Grace is a murder mystery, a whodunit; the killer is caught in the end. Crime does not pay.”

We hardly need reminding that murder is plain wrong, a disordered response. But if we know the ending of every mystery we read, why bother to keep reading the genre?

I suspect one reason, among many, that we eagerly gobble up a new release by our favorite mystery author is we enjoy the puzzle and the sleuth’s hunt.

One notch below enjoying the “mystery” of every mystery novel is the encounter with the moral ambiguity characters face. My hope, as a writer, is that I’ve crafted vivid characters facing difficult moral choices. My hope for the reader is that they ask themselves, “What would I do if I found myself in that situation?”

We may congratulate ourselves that we are better than the characters, especially the villains. However, perhaps the foibles, misadventures, and sins of characters cut close to our moral bone; we are not as good as we would like to believe.

The modern mystery is neither a medieval morality play nor a soap opera moral morass, but an exploration of moral ambiguity.

Jim Allaire

Of Parables and Koans

Costly Grace: A Mystery began as my private obsession to tell a story worthy of reading. Now as book—an object in the universe—it no longer belongs only to me and my subjectivity.

What might I expect from readers? What value will they find in the book? How will readers interpret my story?

The writer Ron Hansen suggests that good stories are like Gospel parables or Zen koans, whose simplicity, upon reflection, keeps expanding our consciousness. He says, “We have the uneasy feeling that we are being interpreted even as we interpret them.” (A Stay Against Confusion, p. 11).

A Book In Print

When the first printed copy of Costly Grace arrived yesterday I was enthralled. I fondled the book like a precious object, like a jade figurine.

Several years ago I had an inkling, a wisp of an idea, that developed into a story. The telling became a manuscript (the first drafts were for me alone). Then winnowing and several revisions followed (with you, dear reader, in mind). More polishing and gritty proofing and finally I have a book in print.

My fondest hope is that Costly Grace will provide enjoyment to mystery fans and all fiction readers. If I hear the words “a good read” from readers, I will judge the toil and travail worthwhile.